Thanks for the shoutout! I have many Opinions on parenting influencers, and your commenter Kat was 100% right - mothers really are preyed on to be 'better'. There's this really bullshit dichotomy in our society in which we're expected to parent like we don't work and work like we don't parent. And that feeling of never being enough is fodder for all kinds of predatory influencing.
To be clear, there are some great people out there sharing really honest wisdom. I highly recommend Sarah Ockwell-Smith. But I had to unfollow influencers, even people I liked, because once you get past the baby/toddler stage (in a league of its own when it comes to capitalism) and have to deal with somewhat trickier stuff, there are a lot of people out there sharing no doubt excellent tools but they all come with #ad. And after a while you start to feel like you won't get it right unless you buy this thing or do things this way. Once I switched off all that, I definitely found I could be guided more by my own intuition, and Surprise! I am enough.
Hey-ya Josh, am enjoying your thoughts, and the thoughts of the other insightful bods here. So I'll trade you a little something I expect you will also enjoy - https://clarkesworldmagazine.com/kritzer_05_23/
I’m thoroughly enjoying your newsletter. However, I do suggest you steer clear of Dr. Nicole LePera‘s work, unless you want to talk about her as one of the grifters in the self improvement space. She has a personal responsibility/bootstraps message that is legitimised via her Dr title. The Vice article “Therapists and Fans are Turning Against Instagram's 'Holistic Psychologist'“ and the Medium article “Dr. Nicole LePera’s History of Gaslighting People of Color” both from 2020 articulates the numerous issues taken with her, and why I personally unfollowed her despite initially thinking she was a useful and credible contributor to mental wellbeing conversations.
I love this little newsletter community. I always get excited when a new post goes out because 1. It’s an interesting topic and gets my sludge brain moving a bit and 2. I get to go the the comments for an actual healthy discussion around what, anywhere else, would be a very divisive topic.
I’ve recently struck a deal with my sister about our current disgusting 5:30am gym schedule. We’ve started giving ourselves two sleep in days a week where we go at night instead, and I’ve found getting up earlier has actually become easier because my little reward motivated brain knows that after I do this two days I get a reward of a sleep in 😂
Turns out, a lot of my self-improvement practices involve self-bribing.
1) fuck I hate fucks that fucking bop along and point at fucking nothing. Fuck these chucklefucks. I don’t have TikTok but it’s infecting other socials. Death to the phantom point and bop.
2) sound baths. I’m okay with them. Not because of the mystical healing properties of specific frequencies. But because if you have a person we’ll versed in yoga nidra they can be so deeply relaxing that you get very close to pissing yourself. *awkward cough*
I wonder if you’ll like this Josh. The Hansons (Rick the Dad and son Forest) mix science based neuroplasticity and psychology research with Buddhist themes . This one .. sounds like a ‘grow your wealth by 10’.. is actually about personal growth . They provide a tonne of totally free newsletters and podcasts.
A European friend of mine observed that the Protestant work ethic thing was all about “doing” but the European vibe was all about “being”. I feel like self-help is about applying doing to being - how to work hard to be better at being, by doing lots of stuff. Hard work if you ask me!
I am fascinated by this newsletter because I have benefited from paid self-help. I read the book “Easy way to quick smoking” and it worked. I did Noom and it worked. I read “This Naked Mind” and it worked. In all three, they tell you they are trying to manipulate your mind and change your perspective, and in all three it worked. I found I had to be willing to be manipulated, if that makes sense, and to go along with it, and not think about it too hard.
My final thought - all the good ideas from L&D I’ve taken at work, have been the same good ideas being taught in parenting books/courses. Turns out how to build good relationships with others and work through conflict are transferable skills.
Noice, I read your footnote. Tool Ænema is fairly explicit on the subject. Many people have many interpretations. My advice, rest, eat healthy, exercise, socialise and live for yourself and others. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your busy schedule to keep us entertained with your writing. Forever grateful.
I would be curious to see your take on the book The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, which is all about unlocking creativity. I really enjoyed it when I worked through it, but looking back I now feel a bit cynical - I think because of the way that creativity was placed on a pedestal above everything else in a person's life.
Always read the comments?
Thanks for the shoutout! I have many Opinions on parenting influencers, and your commenter Kat was 100% right - mothers really are preyed on to be 'better'. There's this really bullshit dichotomy in our society in which we're expected to parent like we don't work and work like we don't parent. And that feeling of never being enough is fodder for all kinds of predatory influencing.
To be clear, there are some great people out there sharing really honest wisdom. I highly recommend Sarah Ockwell-Smith. But I had to unfollow influencers, even people I liked, because once you get past the baby/toddler stage (in a league of its own when it comes to capitalism) and have to deal with somewhat trickier stuff, there are a lot of people out there sharing no doubt excellent tools but they all come with #ad. And after a while you start to feel like you won't get it right unless you buy this thing or do things this way. Once I switched off all that, I definitely found I could be guided more by my own intuition, and Surprise! I am enough.
Hey-ya Josh, am enjoying your thoughts, and the thoughts of the other insightful bods here. So I'll trade you a little something I expect you will also enjoy - https://clarkesworldmagazine.com/kritzer_05_23/
Hi Josh,
I’m thoroughly enjoying your newsletter. However, I do suggest you steer clear of Dr. Nicole LePera‘s work, unless you want to talk about her as one of the grifters in the self improvement space. She has a personal responsibility/bootstraps message that is legitimised via her Dr title. The Vice article “Therapists and Fans are Turning Against Instagram's 'Holistic Psychologist'“ and the Medium article “Dr. Nicole LePera’s History of Gaslighting People of Color” both from 2020 articulates the numerous issues taken with her, and why I personally unfollowed her despite initially thinking she was a useful and credible contributor to mental wellbeing conversations.
I love this little newsletter community. I always get excited when a new post goes out because 1. It’s an interesting topic and gets my sludge brain moving a bit and 2. I get to go the the comments for an actual healthy discussion around what, anywhere else, would be a very divisive topic.
I’ve recently struck a deal with my sister about our current disgusting 5:30am gym schedule. We’ve started giving ourselves two sleep in days a week where we go at night instead, and I’ve found getting up earlier has actually become easier because my little reward motivated brain knows that after I do this two days I get a reward of a sleep in 😂
Turns out, a lot of my self-improvement practices involve self-bribing.
U r welcum.
Couple of points.
1) fuck I hate fucks that fucking bop along and point at fucking nothing. Fuck these chucklefucks. I don’t have TikTok but it’s infecting other socials. Death to the phantom point and bop.
2) sound baths. I’m okay with them. Not because of the mystical healing properties of specific frequencies. But because if you have a person we’ll versed in yoga nidra they can be so deeply relaxing that you get very close to pissing yourself. *awkward cough*
I wonder if you’ll like this Josh. The Hansons (Rick the Dad and son Forest) mix science based neuroplasticity and psychology research with Buddhist themes . This one .. sounds like a ‘grow your wealth by 10’.. is actually about personal growth . They provide a tonne of totally free newsletters and podcasts.
https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/being-well-with-forrest-hanson-and-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936?i=1000611291282
A European friend of mine observed that the Protestant work ethic thing was all about “doing” but the European vibe was all about “being”. I feel like self-help is about applying doing to being - how to work hard to be better at being, by doing lots of stuff. Hard work if you ask me!
I am fascinated by this newsletter because I have benefited from paid self-help. I read the book “Easy way to quick smoking” and it worked. I did Noom and it worked. I read “This Naked Mind” and it worked. In all three, they tell you they are trying to manipulate your mind and change your perspective, and in all three it worked. I found I had to be willing to be manipulated, if that makes sense, and to go along with it, and not think about it too hard.
My final thought - all the good ideas from L&D I’ve taken at work, have been the same good ideas being taught in parenting books/courses. Turns out how to build good relationships with others and work through conflict are transferable skills.
Noice, I read your footnote. Tool Ænema is fairly explicit on the subject. Many people have many interpretations. My advice, rest, eat healthy, exercise, socialise and live for yourself and others. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your busy schedule to keep us entertained with your writing. Forever grateful.
Looooooove the watercolour
I would be curious to see your take on the book The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, which is all about unlocking creativity. I really enjoyed it when I worked through it, but looking back I now feel a bit cynical - I think because of the way that creativity was placed on a pedestal above everything else in a person's life.